The fear of failure and the excitement/happiness that comes from success, like other emotions, trigger reactions within certain portions of the brain, which helps to contribute to our overall learning and growth capabilities.
In our high-achieving society, failure is often seen as the worst situation that one can encounter. Rather than embracing failure as a learning and growth opportunity, those who fail in some aspect of their lives will often see it as an immovable barrier, telling them that they are not capable of overcoming their weaknesses.
The truth is that failure is never the end of the road. It is simply an indicator that there are some parts of ourselves and our lives that we need to put more effort into in order to get the results that we desire.
Are you struggling to overcome failure, rise above it, and seek the path to success?
But if you know how to deal with failure in a healthy way with the right skills and techniques, then perhaps you don’t have to feel the painful emotions of being a failure. One should always try to reduce his fear of failing. As it will also help you in reducing your pain, so you can bounce back more efficiently than before.
Team Inspiring Life provides you with 5 strategies to handle failure.
5 strategies to handle failure.
1. Recognise and accept your emotions
Failure hurts, at least in the first instance, and you need to accept that. Trying to minimise your feelings or distract yourself can be counter-productive in the longer term. Just recognise your feelings for what they are and allow yourself time to hurt a bit.
Don’t, however, dwell on it for too long. That, too, is counter-productive, especially if you blame yourself.
Take a few days for the pain to lessen, and then start to move on.
2. Take the right amount of responsibility.
We have all met people who are always ready to blame others or events for their lack of success.
It is important to recognise when other, external factors have affected your success. You don’t need—and should not try—to blame yourself for everything, particularly if it is outside your control.
It is, however, also important to recognise what you yourself could have done to improve matters. For example, could you have trained or worked harder? Was your revision really all that it could have been? Did you really prepare for that interview in the best possible way?
Take responsibility for the factors over which you have control, and don’t be tempted to hide behind excuses.
3. Use failure as a way to improve
Don’t think of failing as failure. Instead, think of it as life’s way of showing you that you need to improve, and how to do so.
In particular, ask yourself what you could have done differently to achieve a better result. Then consider how you could put that into practice to help you to improve for next time.
4. Don’t worry what anyone else will think.
Sometimes our views about success and failure are tied up in what other people will think about us, or about how we think they will judge us.
You cannot ever control what other people think. Nor should you ever do something simply because it will please other people.
It is easier to accept both success and loss if you define them in your own terms, and do things because you want to achieve, not because you think other people will be pleased.
5. Don’t make it personal.
One reason why some people find this devastating is that their identity is tied up in succeeding.
In other words, when they fail, they see themselves as a failure, rather than perceiving that they have experienced a setback. Try not to see failure or success as personal: instead, it is something that you experience. It does not change the real ‘you’.
This comes back to Kipling’s point: success and non-success are not intrinsic parts of you. No part of your identity should be ‘I am a success’ or ‘I am a failure’.