Toxic nature individuals are extremely dangerous for our own well being. We all know how important it is to give our bodies a break from “toxic” food and alcohol, but what about giving ourselves a break from toxic attitudes? “Just like any toxic thing—like food or poison—toxic nature people are extremely dangerous.
They distract us from our positive or productive habits. They’ll be the people who discourage you from exercise or make fun of you for wanting to be a better person. They’ll come up with reasons for you to stay in other bad relationships. Toxic nature people get you stuck in the past and focused on the negative, and in that mentality, you can’t move forward and you can’t succeed. It is impossible for them to share in your joy.
We have all had toxic nature people dust us with their poison. Sometimes it’s more like a drenching. Difficult people are drawn to the reasonable ones and all of us have likely had (or have) at least one person in our lives who have us bending around ourselves like barbed wire in endless attempts to please them – only to never really get there.
Being able to spot their harmful behaviour is the first step to minimising their impact. You might not be able to change what they do, but you can change what you do with it, and any idea that toxic somebody in your life might have that they can get away with it.
Team Inspiring Life provides you with a list of ways in which you can handle the people with toxic nature.
5 ways to handle people with toxic nature.
1. Don’t get drawn
Dealing with someone’s toxic nature can be exhausting. The person might constantly complain about others, always have a new story about unfair treatment, or even accuse you of wronging them or not caring about their needs.
Resist the urge to jump on the complaining train with them or defend yourself against accusations. Instead, respond with a simple, “I’m sorry you feel that way,” and leave it at that.
2. Don’t be too nice.
It may sound harsh, but since toxic people tend to take advantage of any kindness that’s imparted on them, being overly nice can be detrimental. “Realize that they get their energy from draining your loving, good nature,” says Mackey. “They thrive on your trust and kindness.” It doesn’t mean you have to be cruel (to paraphrase Michelle Obama, when they go low, you want to go high), but you should stop going out of your way to be overly accommodating.
3. Remember you are not at a fault.
Toxic nature can make you feel like you did something wrong, even when you know you didn’t.
It’s tough to face attacks from someone who behaves in a toxic manner. They might get personal, try to twist your words, or accuse you of wanting to hurt them. At some point, you might even second guess yourself and rack your brain for something you might’ve done.
But remind yourself their behaviour has nothing to do with you. Restate your boundaries and try not to take their spite personally. Take deep breaths to calm yourself mindfully acknowledge their words so you can let them go without being affected.
4. Limit your time together
Do you dread seeing a particular person? Feel anxious or stressed beforehand? Take these feelings as a sign you may want to see them less.
People who behave toxically tend to focus on themselves and what they want. They might blame you or other people for any problems they have and show little interest in your feelings or needs. This can make spending time with them unpleasant.
If you’re dealing with someone who picks fights with your or repeatedly pushes your boundaries, consider scaling back the amount of time you spend with them.
5. Avoid playing into their reality
Some people have a tendency to see themselves as the victim in every situation. If they mess up, they might shift the blame to someone else or tell a story that paints them in a more positive light.
You might feel tempted to nod and smile in order to prevent an angry outburst. This might feel like the safest option, but it can also encourage them to see you as a supporter.
While your disagreement might upset them, it might also lower the chances they’ll try involving you again.