Forget the past is a question many of us ask ourselves each time we experience heartache or emotional pain: how do you forget past hurts and move on?
Holding on to the past can be a conscious decision just like letting go and moving forward can be a conscious decision.
One thing that connects us as human beings is our ability to feel pain. Whether that pain is physical or emotional, we all have experiences of being hurt. What separates us though, is how we deal with that pain.
In some research it has been found that when emotional pain prevents you from healing from a situation, it’s a sign that we aren’t moving forward in a growth-oriented way.
One of the best ways to heal from hurts is to learn lessons from the situation and use those to focus on growth and forward momentum. If we get stuck in thinking about what “should have been,” we can become immobilized in painful feelings and memories.
People say it is very important to keep in mind things you’ve done in the past so that you can have evidence for what your life turns out to be. I say history is nothing but history. What you have done in the past has absolutely no role to play in your future. We have all done things or been through situations that we are not so proud of or happy with, which is part of life.
Team Inspiring Life provides you with 5 steps on how to forget the past.
5 steps to forget the past.
1. Focus on the present.
One of the most effective ways to forget the past is to embrace the present. Instead of reliving the past and getting consumed with negativity, keep yourself active and enjoy the current moment. Learn a new skill. Meditate. Exercise. Have dinner with a friend. Make a new friend. Whatever it is, just live in the moment – even if it’s just sitting at your desk and watching the clouds roll by. .
Living in the moment, also called mindfulness, “involves being with your thoughts as they are, neither grasping at them nor pushing them away.” Psychology Today states that “mindful people are happier, more exuberant, more empathetic, and more secure.”
To achieve a more mindful state, be aware of what you are thinking and feeling, reduce self-consciousness, seek out new experiences and accept your negative feelings and situations as merely being a part of life.
2. Disconnect yourself.
Allow yourself to take some time away so that you can clear your head. You don’t have to go backpacking through Europe. Just remove yourself from the situation by distancing yourself from the people, places and things that remind you of the past. Practicing ways to disconnect for a while will give you the chance to experience something positive — even if that’s just camping at a nearby campground without any access to social media.
When you return, you’ll have a perspective on the past.
3. Create positive environment.
How you talk to yourself can either move you forward or keep you stuck. Often, having a mantra that you tell yourself in times of emotional pain can help you reframe your thoughts and forget the past.
For example, instead of getting stuck in, try a positive mantra such as, “I am fortunate to be able to find a new path in life — one that is good for me.”
4. Engage in self care.
When we are hurting, it often feels like there is nothing but hurt. practicing self-care can look like setting boundaries, saying no, doing the things that bring us joy and comfort, and listening to our own needs first.
The more we can implement self-care into our daily lives, the more empowered we are and help us forget the past. From that space, our hurts don’t feel as overwhelming,
5. Surround yourself with positive people.
This simple yet powerful tip can help carry you through a lot of hurt and guide you forget the past.
We can’t do life alone, and we can’t expect ourselves to get through our hurts alone. Allowing ourselves to lean on loved ones and their support is such a wonderful way of not only limiting isolation but of reminding us of the good that is in our lives.