The idea of radically taking charge of your life can seem scary. After all, we live in a society that encourages us to take as little charge as possible. The problem with this, however, is that when you go through life without a purpose or a plan, you lose touch with what matters and you lose touch with your joy.
What happens to those who fail to live your life that is defined by their own goals and desires? Over and over again, heartbroken, lamenting the time they had wasted and the meaningful relationships they had lost touch with.
It’s easy to get swept up in the endless parades of wants and desires that are being directed at us at all times from the world (and our loved ones) around us. The problem with losing who you are in other people, though, is that they aren’t there with you when it comes to the final number. You are the only one who crosses that final finish line with yourself with your life and it is only your regrets and wishes you have to contend with at the final curtain call.
Sometimes, living your life on your own terms means making a break from the things you know or making radical and dramatic changes to your personal and professional environment. Sometimes, however, it’s as simple as being a little more mindful and spending a little more time looking inward.
Team Inspiring Life will guide you through the proven 5 methods for living your life in your own terms.
5 proven steps for living your life in your own terms
1. Take responsibility for your own happiness.
Though we are encouraged to think that happiness can be found in material goods or romantic relationship, nothing could be further from the truth. Happiness can only come from within, and the only way to live your life on your own terms (fully) is to embrace this with a wild abandon.
Take responsibility for your own happiness and go after the things you want and the things that stoke your passion and creativity. Choose to be happy in whatever it is that you do and make yourself the most important person in your life
2. Mind your own business.
More often than not, you fail to live your life on your own terms because you cannot keep your noses out of other people’s business. It’s not your fault, really — it’s our human nature. Not only does it drive us to be curious, it also drives us to seek the love and acceptance of the people around us.
Though our nature drives us to wonder about the colour of the grass on the other side of the fence, feeding that compulsive need also drives us further and further away from our authentic selves. In order to live a life that is free of the terms of others, you have to learn how to mind your own business and you have to learn how to keep yourself to yourself when it’s appropriate.
3. Cut out the toxic people in your life.
This cannot be stressed enough — you attract what you surround yourself with. If you insist on surrounding yourself with toxic people, you can expect more toxicity in your life.
The toxic people in our lives are the ones who make their mission to interfere in our business. They constantly point out your flaws or tell you how you “should be” living your life, taking over your life little by little until your broken down, lost and hopeless.
Eliminate these people from your life. Focus, instead, on surrounding yourself with people who support you on your quest to live a life that’s defined by you and you alone.
4. Consider your past, but don’t get caught up in it.
In order to figure out where you are or where you’re going, you have to figure out where you’ve been. If you’re looking to start living life on your own terms, you have to start by looking at your past — but, you have to do it in a ways that doesn’t keep you attached, emotional or fearful.
Consider what elements of your history keep you chained to the opinion of others and do what you can to unravel those hangups. Think about what you tried in the past to achieve your goals and think about the way you reacted when those things didn’t go to plan. Recall all the things that worked and all the things that didn’t work, paying especially close attention to triggers and stumbling blocks that set you back or left you disappointed. Once you’ve got all that in sight, you can trace a better path forward — working with a new blueprint that allows you to see what works, what doesn’t and what pitfalls to avoid.
5. Stop holding yourself back — run for it.
We all hesitate when we’re faced with difficult decisions but, more often than not, this hesitation comes from a sense of self-doubt more than a need to consider the options carefully.
If you truly want to tap into a life that’s untamed by the will of others, you have to stop holding yourself back.
Though it’s important to analyse a situation carefully before jumping to conclusions, it’s equally as important to make sure we are not allowing ourselves to be paralyzed by fear.